Okay, don't think this will make the great book Guinness, but a new world record has been set tonight. Randall Ajimine had two (that's right, two) dates in the span of one month! Load the confetti cannons, bust out the champagne, take the day off, organize a parade...but don't strike up the band just yet.
I'm not entirely sure it counts as a date date. We just hung out at Coffee Talk for a couple hours, coffee talking (over tea and Italian soda). To most people, that's just hanging out, but I'm counting it as a date because...because this is my blog and I get to make the rules.
So this date went a lot better than the last one (see blog 85). I actually got to hold a conversation with the girl this time. And it was nice, friendly, interesting. And that's about it.
"That's it?"
Yeah, that's about it.
"Tell me more, tell me more..."
Well, that's just it. Maybe I'm being unreasonable, maybe my expectations are too high. I mean, it was nice. There was polite conversation throughout...but...
But I don't know. I was trying to figure it out on the way home after dropping her off. What's missing? Why isn't nice good enough? She's a Christian, she's cute, she's got shortish hair, she even wears glasses, and she's taking the bar next year so she's smart (see blog 62). So what's the deal?
Well, I don't have it all figured out yet but I did have the beginnings of a theory, and it goes something like this:
Some people let life happen to them. Some people try to make life happen. Some people prefer to watch the life around them and try to make some sense of it all. I'm sure if I thought about it, I could come up with more generalizations but those will do for now.
See, with all due respect to this girl, she seems to be someone who lets life happen to her. Not that she's lazy or passive, I just get the sense that the things she chooses to pursue are things that she happened to run across through the course of her life. It's not something that's an expression of a deeper, core passion or hers. Of course, being that I only got to hang with her for a couple hours, I could be wrong about this, but I tried asking questions that someone with core passion would have picked up on, but she just answered matter of factly.
Of the three types of people I listed above, I'm more like that last sort - I like to observe the life happening around me and I like to ask questions because I'm trying to make sense of it all. And that's the kind of girl I'm looking to meet. And she just wasn't like that.
Will I ask her out again? I don't know, maybe if there's something where I need a date I'll ask her if she'd like to go, but to just go hang out somewhere or for dinner...I don't think so.
See, this is me being too picky again, but...but that's how I am. It's like the books I read. I go to Borders and browse the new titles. If a book doesn't grab me with the first few sentences, it goes back on the shelf. It's just been my experience that books that don't grab me right away are not books that I'll enjoy as a whole. I don't have the patience necessary to aclimate to an unfamiliar writer's style and the few times that I've tried to power through and read something that was not the norm for me style wise...I never finish those books (usually don't even make it to the ending of act one).
But what can I do?
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1 comment:
WEll I have to say that I am so glad that this "date" was better than the last one. But I just want to put out there that your little thing about if the book doesn't catch you right away you don't read it applying to girls might not always work. Girls are more complex than a book. In a book what you see is what you get and sometimes the girl is guarding herself and you don't really get to know her till later. So I don't know if you can truely make a accurate judgement of a person from a couple hours of conversation. Just my opinion!
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